


"Daughter" Doesn't Feel Right

by pokemonkatia168757



Category: The Owl House (Cartoon)
Genre: Kinda, Questioning Luz, nonbinary luz
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-20
Updated: 2020-12-10
Packaged: 2021-03-07 23:41:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,219
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26556004
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pokemonkatia168757/pseuds/pokemonkatia168757
Summary: Growing up, Luz's mom had always called hermija. It felt right. Sometimes she would refer to her as herdaughter.It felt… off.They mean the same thing, but Luz couldn't help but notice the difference.Then she came to The Boiling Isles, and met Eda. At first, she was simply,the human,or sometimes,my human.As they grew closer though, she becamekid,andkiddo.When Lilith first started living in The Owl House, Luz wasthe human girl.Which wasn'tbadbut… it felt off.
Comments: 25
Kudos: 185





	1. Chapter 1

“Kid, it’s too early for this.” Eda dragged herself into the kitchen, not being able to deal with the antics of the human without her morning cup of apple blood.

“Sorry Eda! I’m just really excited! I’m meeting up with Willow, Gus, and Amity today!” Luz bounced off the walls of the living room, with way too much energy for a teenager.

“Well, have fun,” Lilith sighed as she left for the door. “And Eda, learn to control your daughter.”

While everyone laughed, Luz was left with the feeling that something was off. Was it that Lilith referred to her as Eda’s? No, others had joked about that sometimes too, and Luz hadn’t felt this way. Was it cause it was Lilith? No, she had grown fond of Eda’s older sister. She was stuck on the word “daughter”. Why did that feel so wrong?

“Bap!” King jumped on her back, shocking Luz out of her thoughts.

“King!” She reached around and dragged him off of her back. “What are you doing?”

“Whatcha thinking about, kid?” Eda relaxed on the couch with her cup of apple blood.

Luz turned to face her mentor. Eda might not always understand everything, but she would always be there to listen.

“Did Lily say something? Say the word and I’ll change the password on her,” she chuckled at her own joke, but Luz could tell she was serious.

The human sighed and plopped down next to the witch. “No. Well, yes, but no!” She groaned. It wasn’t a big deal.

Eda raised her eyebrows and stared at the young human, waiting for her to continue.

She groaned, “it’s not a big deal. I don’t know why it bothers me!”

“I’m not a mind reader kid, you’re gonna have to be a little more specific.”

Luz weighed her options. Eventually, she got out, “Lilith called me _daughter_ , and I don’t know how I feel about it.”

Eda sighed, “I’m sorry Luz, I know she didn’t mean it that way. I know we can never replace-”

“No!” Luz stopped her, “that’s not what I meant!”

Eda waited for her to continue.

“I’m fine with being called kid, and with being referred to as your kid, but…” Luz fidgeted. “ _Daughter_ just feels...weird.”

“Is it just that word, or do you not like others too?”

Luz paused. Eda was so genuine in her response. She didn’t laugh it off, or call her dumb, or tell her to get over it. She just accepted that Luz didn’t like it.

“My mom calls me _mija,_ which means _daughter,_ but it doesn’t make me feel the same way that daughter does.”

Eda nodded, “how do you feel about _girl_? Or _lady?_ ”

She put her hand to her mouth in thought. “ _Girl_... isn’t bad. _Lady_ seems weird. Like _daughter_.”

“Is it a bad weird?”

Luz leaned back on the couch and looked up at the ceiling. She nodded, “a little.”

“How do you feel about _boy_? Or _son_?”

She scrunched her face, “ _boy_ … isn’t bad? _Son_ I don’t like.”

Eda pulled Luz closer. “Have you questioned your gender before?”

“I don’t think this is really “questioning my gender”,” Luz pulled away. “I mean, it’s just a bunch of stupid words.”

“Well, you don’t have to if you don’t want to,” Eda started, “but you can if you want to. You can question it and end up where you started if you want. But, you are allowed to question yourself as much as you want.”

Luz starred out across the room. “I mean, I’m a girl.” She stopped, and crinkled her nose. Why did that feel so wrong to say? “At least, I don’t think I’m _not_ a girl.” She groaned, “ugh! I don’t know! I don’t know how I feel.” She threw her hands to her face and fell back on the couch.

Eda wrapped her arm around the young human, “well, you don’t have to figure it out right away.”

Luz nodded.

“And Luz?”

She moved her hands away and looked up at her.

“If I ever say _anything_ that makes you uncomfortable? Tell me. Call me out right there. Let me know, and I won’t do it again.”

Luz leaned into her mentor’s hug and nodded.

Eda looked down at the teen, “do you wanna continue this talk?”

Thinking for a minute, she nodded slowly, “yeah.”

“Well, do you think you could be nonbinary?”

She mulled it over. “Maybe? But, I don’t know. That doesn’t… I’m not…” she trailed off.

“Well, it’s a broad term. And you don’t need a term to define yourself if you don’t want it!”

That got a chuckle out of the young human.

“Well, what about pronouns? Are you okay with she/her?”

Luz nodded, “yeah, I think so.” _She_ is a human. _Her_ name is Luz. She nodded again.

“They/them? He/him?”

 _They_ are a human. _Their_ name is Luz. “ _They_ isn’t bad.” _He_ is a human. _His_ name is Luz. Her face scrunched. “ _He_ is weird.”

Eda sighed, “okay, here’s the deal kid. I don’t know much about any of this, but I will always be here if you need me at all, okay?”

Luz turned around and hugged her, “thanks, Eda.”

“Okay, one more thing before you go running off to your friends-”

“Friends! I forgot about them!” Luz jumped up, and ran towards the staircase.

“Hey! What did I say?”

“Oops, sorry Eda! What’s up?”

The older witch sighed, “can I talk to Lilith about our talk?”

“Lilith?”

“I don’t want you feeling uncomfortable in your own house. Can I talk to her so she knows what not to call you?”

“You don’t have to do that-”

“I know I don’t. I want to. But I won’t if you don’t want me to.”

Luz looked up past the staircase in thought. “That’s fine, I think.”

They stared at each other for a moment. Eda sighed, “well, get ready and get out of here before they come _here_ looking for you. I’m going back to sleep!”

Luz laughed as she ran up to her room.


	2. Chapter 2

The houses lining the street looked mostly the same. Luz glanced down at the paper Gus had given her. 

“Hmmm, which one is it?” She asked herself, looking around. In the distance, she spotted a familiar green haired girl. “Amity!” She ran up to her.

The witch jumped at the unexpected encounter. “Luz!” She stuttered, “hi!”

“Is this Gus’s house?” Luz asked, looking up at the house in front of them. “All these houses look the same to me, and I’m still learning how to use the scroll Eda gave me.”

The green haired witch nodded quickly, “um, yup. Looks like this is it.” She pointed to the door in front of them. 

Luz jumped at the door and knocked loudly, “Gus! We’re here!”

Amity held her books to her chest as the door opened. 

“Luz! Amity! Welcome to my home!” The illusion track teen did a fancy bow, then laughed. “Willow’s inside already. Come on!” 

He led them into the living room, where Willow was at the table, surrounded by papers.

The human danced around the house, looking at everything. “Gus! Your place is so nice!”

“My dad isn’t home right now, but he’ll be back for dinner! He’s excited to finally meet a real  _ human _ !” 

Amity sat down next to Gus and started doing homework.

“Gus! Is this your bedroom?” Luz called from down the hallway. “Is that a rubik's cube?!” She 

ran back into the living room, holding the colorful cube. 

The teens looked at her as she plopped down next to Willow. 

“I’m sooo good at these!” She started to focus on the object, turning it and moving the pieces around.

Gus stared in amazement, “what are you doing? What does it do?”

“You see, the goal of this object is to match all the colors, so that every side is it’s own color!”

“Um, Luz, aren’t we here to do homework and study?” Willow asked.

"What happens when you solve it? Does it explode?!" Gus needed to know more.

Luz chuckled, "both of those things will be clear in time, my good friends."

Willow stared at her cryptic friend. Realizing that Luz was just  _ like that _ , she went back to her homework. 

As she worked on the cube, Luz kept trailing back to her talk with Eda. 

She threw her head back and groaned.

"Um… are you okay, Luz?" Amity asked.

Luz sighed, still looking up at the ceiling, "can I ask you guys a weird question?"

The group looked at each other. 

"Yeah."

"Sure." 

"What's up?"

Luz looked down at the cube and continued to fiddle with it, "has someone ever said something about you, and it just felt… weird?"

Willow set her pencil down, "like, in what way?"

Luz bit her lip, "I don't know. Lilith said something and it just-"

"Lilith! I knew we couldn't trust her!" Amity shot up, "what did she do? I'll go get her now-"

"No, no! It's not like that!" Luz tried to calm her down.

Willow looked over at the green haired girl, "let's let Luz finish, okay?"

Her face flushed red. She sighed and sunk back down, "you're right. Sorry Luz."

"It's fine," Luz smiled, "thanks for worrying about me."

Amity's face got redder.

"Well, what did Lilith say?" Gus prompted.

Luz looked up at him, then turned away. "She called me Eda's  _ daughter _ , which is fine. I like 

being Eda's kid!" She sighed, "I don't know. I just don't like the word  _ daughter _ . Never have."

After a moment, Amity spoke up, “it’s not exactly the same but…”

The group looked over at her, and she continued, “my mom always goes on about how one day I’ll get married to some handsome  _ guy _ . I ignore it, but it always feels weird. I don’t like guys.”

Luz smiled, “yeah! Maybe I’ll end up with a guy, but what if I like a girl? Or a nonbinary person? I can like whoever I want!”

“Or no one!” Gus jumped up, “my worth isn’t defined by if I end up with someone or not!” 

Luz jumped to the other couch, high-fiving Gus and Amity. “Yeah!”

The group laughed as she sat back down. Feeling more confident, Luz continued, “I don’t know, me and Eda ended up talking about gender stuff, but I’m still confused.”

Willow put her hand on her friend’s knee, “you don’t need to have everything figured out, Luz.”

Luz smiled, “thanks.”

“So,” Amity asked, “did you want us to call you something else?”

“Something else?” Gus looked at her.

“Yeah, like name, pronouns.”

Luz leaned forward in thought, “I mean, I like my name. Name is fine.”   
  


“I like your name too,” Amity whispered.

“What was that?” Luz looked over at her.

“Nothing! That’s-um, good to know!”

Luz nodded, “I’m... not sure about pronouns. I’m fine with she/her.” She thought about it, “at least, I think I am.”

"Do you want us to try some out? See how you feel about it?" Amity's voice was gentle.

Luz shrugged, "maybe?"

Amity looked up for a moment in thought, then said, "this is my friend Luz.  _ She _ is a human, and  _ she _ is very smart.  _ They _ get into a lot of trouble, but  _ they _ always have a good time.  _ They  _ are amazing and…" she trailed off, looking at Luz. " _ He _ is a student at Hexside, but  _ he _ hasn't started  _ his _ homework yet."

The group laughed.

"You're good at that, Amity!" Gus said.

She blushed, "oh, no. I just tried to remember what we did when my other friend came out."

Willow nodded, and turned to Luz, "so, what do you think?"

"I don't like  _ he _ ," she said, thinking back to her talk with Eda. "I didn't like  _ they _ this morning, but I don't know. It's not bad right now.”

"You don't have to have it all figured out right now." Gus reminded her.

"And I know that there are other pronouns too, if you don't like any of these. I don’t know what they are, but I can look them up if you want!”

"Maybe later," she said in thought.  _ She, she. They, they. _

"I don't  _ not _ like  _ she _ ," she said eventually. 

"Do you like  _ they _ better?" Willow asked.

Luz paused, thinking it over.

" _ They _ haven’t started  _ their _ homework yet, and I’m not sure  _ they  _ even brought it,” Amity smirked 

and nudged the human. 

Luz nodded along, thinking it over. "I… I think I like that?"

She looked around the table at all of her friends, who waited for her to continue.

“I’m not sure right now. I don’t mind either but…”

"How about this- we'll go back and forth for the day while we study. You deserve a break from 

thinking.” Willow said.

“Yeah!” Gus exclaimed, “and you can just tell us if we say something wrong, okay?”

“Well,” Luz said, taking some papers out of their bag, “I do have some potions homework I need some help on.”

Gus looked around the table and said, “I think you’re asking the wrong people for help.”

Amity narrowed her eyes, “if it’s basic stuff, I could try. But anything advanced you’ll have to ask someone else.”

Luz sighed, “I’ll just ask Eda-” she stopped, changing her mind. “I’ll ask  _ Lilith _ later.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've had this written for a while, but I haven't had time to finish editing it thanks to finals (glad that's done). Thanks for being patient! I definitely want to write more Owl House fic, and hopefully I'll have time to now that finals are done.

**Author's Note:**

> This has been living in my head since Luz's line in Grom (I'm a bad boy) and I finally wrote it down. It's marked as incomplete because I might write another chapter.  
> I'm mainly basing this off of my headcanons and a little bit of my experience/feelings about this (I'm cis, but sometimes words are annoying), so if I did something wrong/you have any thoughts let me know!


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